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The Smalltown & Dullbridge Disaster Emergency Response (SaDDER) report into the recent fire at Cllr Trolley’s premises has been published.
The cause has been revealed as the spontaneous combustion of illiberal party election material. The past achievements and future plans appeared too hot to handle.
However, your dedicated reporter has waded through all 94 report appendices and had their interest piqued by the items listed that did not burn. Rope. And ladies underwear.
SomersetClive is reminded of the long since deleted social media posts on Twatter from Cllr Trolley. A number of links appeared to videos liked by Dick on popular channel TooRude concerning knots appropriate for rope bondage.
And in a particularly unexpected turn of events Trolley offered his services to a person requiring printing on Twatter. Nothing wrong with that except the payment method offered by the overseas lady. Her worn undergarments.
Cllr Trolley was unavailable for comment before publication owing to his ongoing reconstruction work. And election campaign.