Deserting the sinking ship

Following the resignations of both the Smalltown Media and Uproar Genius (SMUG) and the Smalltown Head Administration Genius (SHAG), Town Mayor Mark Facelift is the latest to announce his resignation from Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council.

Facelift has told his fellow councillors that he won’t seek re-election in the upcoming May election.

SomersetClive understands that the names of further Councillors who have had enough will be revealed over the course of the next month.

Both the Illiberal and BeFuddled parties have heen desperately searching for candidates to put forward but with little success. The Illiberal Party has even approached two former Town Council Illiberal members, both of whom were deselected before the previous election when Squire Teflon decided that the pair had ‘ideas above their station’.

Another possible candidate, a former Mayor of Smalltown and Dullbridge, has also been asked to stand, but has declined the offer because he doesn’t want to be associated with ‘that level of skulduggery’.

At this rate the local Illiberals may have to seriously consider exhuming Lord Admiral, His Royal Highness, Former Mayor of Smalltown and Dullbridge, Nelson Jones, MBE, OBE and Knight of the Living Dead, and putting him forward as a candidate.

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