Smalltown and Dullbridge Missing Person has spoken out about the news that he will not be representing the two towns after the next general election due to the constituency boundary changes.
Residents in Smalltown, Dullbridge, Barrow and Bream will join with Fridgpond to become part of the new Smalltown and Dullbridge. Fridgpond Unitary Constituency (SaDFUC) which will have a new Missing Person after the next election. Current SaD Missing Person, Tim Teepee will represent the reshaped Smells constituency which will no longer include Smalltown and Dullbridge.
Speaking to SomersetClive Mr Teepee said
“Smalltown, Barrow, Bream and what’s that other place? Bullbridge? Cullbridge? Gullbridge? Nullbridge? Nope. I can’t remember. Leave it with me it’ll come back to me eventually.
What was I saying? Oh yes. Smalltown, Barrow, Bream and (cough)-bridge have been a wonderful set of communities to represent for the last eight years and I will continue to represent them until the next election when the boundaries change.
The residents often send me letters and emails asking me for my help and I ignore all of them equally.
But I will miss these communities enormously. Residents in Smalltown and – is it Backofthefridge? – are very clear about what is going wrong locally and are very quick to point out the area’s shortcomings. Not surprising really, given that the local Town Council is run by the BeFuddleds and we all know what a mess they always make of things.
I believe Smalltown and.. Hmmm… Raisethedrawbridge?.. are seaside areas? I think I’ve got that right, although on the few occasions that I’ve been to Smalltown I’ve never seen the sea and I’ve never even set foot in the other place, so have no idea where it is or if it’s by the sea.
Yes, there’s no doubt in my mind – I’m really going to miss Smalltown and Deadinaditch.”
The various local political parties will now be assembling their Selection Panels to choose their preferred candidates for the new SaDFUC constituency, with all eyes on Fridgpond Working Man’s Party who are likely to provide the winner.