As he continues his look ahead at the major events in Smalltown and Dullbridge in 2023, psychopomp Mystic Mick reveals that he has taken advice from his spirit guide Hero Shima.
July
A shortage of trolleys at all the supermarkets in Smalltown and Dullbridge causes consternation for shoppers. It will later emerge that former SaDTC Councillor and leader of the Dullbridge Liberation Front has been stockpiling them for use in her ‘Dullbridge Relief Scheme’.
Someone accidentally mentions the missing Welcome to Smalltown sign, causing former SaD Town Councillor, Dick Trolley to exclaim “What part of ‘Never mention it again’ don’t people understand?”.
August
With the holiday season in full swing the M94 is closed on a near-continual basis causing gridlock in both Dullbridge and Smalltown.
Reports that Mistress Bones’ World Record Beating Olympic Sized Ice Rink has been found prove to be untrue. With Mistress Bones saying “It will never be found. Squire Teflon sold it ages ago and we invested the money into more tat to sell in my Newspaper and Tat Emporium.”
September
Smalltown resident Ethel Roswell will claim to have been “abducted by an alien” who “probed her every orifice”. She describes the experience as “extremely distressing”, causing widespread panic in Smalltown and Dullbridge. Police later track a suspect down at an address in Kidlington Street, but no arrest is made.
Yet another Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Councillor resigns this time stating that they are “getting too old to travel all the way from my home in Fridgpond to prop up Squire Teflon”. The BeFuddled Party Councillors agree to Squire Teflon’s request to choose a replacement. Unfortunately, the Squire’s close-friend Mistress Bones has had enough of trying to get a seat on SaDTC and the Squire is only able to attract Horace Monsoon to take on the role.