Town Mayor and Headmistress at the Hayloft Road Palace Retirement Home for Bemused and Bewildered BeFuddled Party ex-Teachers (and Others), Kelsey Dullard’s ‘Let’s Celebrate Youth’ event proved as popular as her previous ‘Let’s Celebrate Climate Change’ event.
Both events saw a distinct lack of interest from residents and young people, with only the groups who had been invited to attend actually turning up.
“I don’t understand it at all. I asked all the young people in Smalltown to come to school on Saturday to see what the various youth groups in Smalltown and Dullbridge have to offer and not a single child turned up, apart from the few who attended as part of their various groups.” Mayor Dullard said.
“I didn’t even manage to hand out all my medals, because no one was nominated to receive a Climate Champion award.”
The event, held at Queen Ethelred’s School, did prove popular with some of the Royal Navy Cadets from HMS Smalltown and Dullbridge who relieved their boredom by taking themselves into the car park for a game of football during the morning.
Undaunted by having spent £400 of Council Tax Payer money on hiring the school for the occasion, despite Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council owning two properties of their own which could have been used free of charge, and purchasing the awards, Mayor Dullard said “I am determined that SaDTC will set up a Youth Council. I know previous attempts to do so have failed, but I’m going to send a letter to every parent in Smalltown and Dullbridge, expressing my disappointment that their offspring didn’t join in and telling them that the pupils really need to pull their socks up and do better.”
We sent a SomersetClive reporter into Smalltown during the event to ask young people why they weren’t in school celebrating being young. A gaggle of youths gathered in Chateau Gardens told us “It’s boring, init? Anyway, we’ve been suspended from Queen Ethelred’s, so we couldn’t go even if we wanted to. Which we don’t.”