BeFuddled Party announce decision

The Fridgpond BeFuddled Party has announced their ‘choice’ of Candidate for the next General Election in the new Smalltown and Dullbridge, Fridgpond Unitary Constituency (SaDFUC).

As predicted by SomersetClive, Clara Scullery, Deputy Chair of the Somerset BeFuddled Group at ANYUSSC has been ‘selected’ by BeFuddled Party members as their Prospective Parliamentary Missing Person.

It is understood that Ms Scullery attained the role by nefarious means – to whit – telling her opponent, Young Eager-Beaver Tim Peeking, that if he didn’t discourage members from voting for him then he would find himself on the receiving end of a punishment that even Smalltown and Dullbridge Deputy Dictator Cruella Sherry would struggle to administer.

A BeFuddled spokesfencepost said “Clara Scullery is a self-nominated community champion, which is a completely made-up title but sounds good,. She has received overwhelming support from colleagues, who didn’t really have a choice, which made making a decision very easy for some of us.”

Ms Scullery said” “I’d like to thank Tim Peeking for standing aside to let the better person win. He certainly dodged a bullet there.

The Befuddled Party in Somerset has proved to voters that they can be trusted to make the right decisions for the electorate. Look at our huge success in getting the All-New-Yet-Unimproved Somerset Cuonty Council onto the list of ‘Councils most likely to go bankrupt’. There’s no doubt about it, you are in safe hands with the BeFuddleds.

The new SaDFUC constituency is one of the most exciting in Somerset. I don’t think I can think of a more exciting one. It’s very exciting. I’ve never been so excited about Fridgpond before and I’m really looking forward to getting out there and meeting the people, whom I’m sure will be as thrilled as I am to meet me.

This next General Election may well see the BeFuddled Party sweep to victory across the country, and the next Prime Minister could be a BeFuddled. It could even be me.”

Meanwhile, it is understood that the Working Man’s Party are so confident of the win in the SaDFUC constituency that they aren’t going to announce the name of a single candidate but will instead have a collective of candidates who will take turns at being the Missing Person, as that’s the only fair way to do it.

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