Squire Teflon turns pimp

Squire Teflon and Lord Pox meet a Smalltown Posh resident

.It has recently been revealed that Squire Teflon has added a new string to his bow as he turns his hand to pimping.

For a very small fee the Squire is offering the chance for residents in Smalltown to meet Lord Rashley Pox.

Speaking to SomersetClive Squire Teflon said “This is a great opportunity for the lowly residents of Smalltown to meet a real Lord. How exciting is that?

As you all know, Lord Pox is the Illiberal Party Prospective Missing Person for the new constituency of Smalltown and Dullbridge, Fridgpond Unitary Constituency (SaDFUC) and as part of his campaign he wants to meet with anyone who might want to discuss their issues with him.

I have had several long conversations with him about my issues already, but he’s told me to see if there’s anyone out there who may want to discuss something other than Albanian Whiskey.

If there is anyone who wants to have Lord Pox turn up on their doorsteps, contact me and I can arrange it for you. I can do that for you because I have restricted access to Lord Pox. Did I mention that he’s a real Lord? See? I told you I have friends in high places.”

As we went to press not a single resident had taken Squire Teflon up on his offer.

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