As the White Elephant Enclosure heads towards its13th year of ownership by Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Council, having been saved for the Nation by Squire Teflon after previous owners Sadgebore District Council sought to get rid of loss-making ventures, the news that the White Elephant Enclosure Mismanagement Committee has appointed not one, but two, new employees in the ongoing and never ending attempt to reverse the fortunes of the WEE has gone down like a lead balloon with residents.
A visibly delighted Deputy Dictator Eugenie ‘Cruella’ Sherry had smugly announced the news to Councillors on Tuesday, but if she thought the appointments would go down well with anyone outside of the Committee she has sadly misread the room.
When the BeFuddled Party took control of SaD Town Council there was a hope that they may take a different approach to the WEE, perhaps looking into the finances and questioning why, after 11 years of being run by a bunch of inept Councillors, such huge sums of money were still being requested with the promise that “This upcoming year it will be different. We fully expect the WEE to be paying its own way and it will absolutely, no question, definitely (maybe) require less Council Tax Payers money next year”. Instead the amount paid to keep it creaking along has increased.
Now, instead of a single Smalltown Culture and Arts Manager (SCAM), which was the situation when the BeFuddleds took control, residents are paying for TWO employees, the BeFuddleds having agreed to the previous SCAM’s suggesting that she needed someone else to do her work, because she couldn’t be bothered.
The new Smalltown Permanent Arts Manager, Susie Cookbook brings with her plenty of previous experience in running local-authority led WEEs and of spending tax payers money on venues.
However, it seems that she is on a downward spiral, having previously run a 1000 seat venue, followed by a 400 seat venue and now a 198 seat WEE. In her previous position at the Elephant Field Theatre in Fishenham Susie oversaw a production of ‘The World’s Worst Pantomime’ a performance which was so bad it saw the entire audience receive refunds for their tickets and led to the Elephant Field receiving national media attention.
The Elephant Field has also received large cash injections by Fishenham Town Council to keep it going, so if anyone is expecting next year’s WEE budget to be less than this years is likely to be sorely disappointed.
The offer from Smalltown Impresario, Padraig Irishh, owner of the Blitz Cinema, was dismissed without discussion, so set were Councillors determined to keep the WEE under their inexperienced control.
A pity, because Mr Irishh has secured the screening rights to the new Tailor Drift Tour Experience over several nights, which is certain to prove popular with Smalltown and Dullbridge residents. Whilst at the WEE the same weekend a single performance of a play has so far attracted an audience of 27. Tonight’s Comedy Club show has sold only half of the available 80 tickets and as an idea to put bums on seats has clearly failed.
In a few months time the budget for 2024/25 will be set and residents can look forward to the cries of “Oh, but Susie has only been in the job for a few months, we need to give her time to sort the WEE out, but we are confident that next year will be better.”
Isn’t it about time someone changed the broken record?