SaD Ffart representative

Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Councillors recently voted to officially partner with Ffart – the Fund For Art, which works with communities to offer opportunities to participate and engage with the creative arts, heritage and cultural activities.

Ffart has previously helped the Our Dullbridge group with financing for a number of creative projects in the town, as well as assisting in spending an awful lot of money from the Chernobyl-by-Sea Slush Fund on the Smalltown seawall art project.

SaD Town Council will join other organisations who are already partnered with Ffart, including Fridgpond Town Council, Homes in Sadgebore and Fridgpond Old People Group.

Ffart invited SaD Town Council to appoint a representative to the consortium. Headmistress, Mayor and Dictator Cllr Kelsey Dullard immediately offered her services, but was advised there would be very few photo opportunities and that meetings would be held in Dullbridge.

All eyes then turned to Squire Teflon. Surely he would offer to be the Council’s representative, after all he’s volunteered tor every other panel and working group going in an attempt to grasp on to any vestiges of the power he once had.

Catching sight of the expectant faces Squire Teflon said “I’d love to. But it’s Dullbridge. And I don’t know anything about art, unless you can call my arrangements of empty Albanian Whiskey bottles art.”

Cllr Banish Barracuda then mused “Errrm. What we errrrm need here is errrrm someone who has their errrrm finger on the errrrm pulse of the errrrm local arts and errrrm culture scene. Someone young and errrrm enthusiastic.

Someone who knows their Pickass from their errrrm Pollocks, their Derek Claphams from errrrm their Johnny Bendricks. Someone who errrm watches Strictly Come errrm Prancing.”

The Councillors looked at each other in horror. Which of them was the most creative?

Finally Robert NotBothered put up his hand. “I suppose I could do it? I did drive tanks in the Army and I’ve got a flagpole in the garden. I’m sure I’ll fit in well with these creative types. I’m also on the White Elephant Enclosure Mismanagement Committee. I think the WEE is supposed to be something to do with art?

Besides it’s Dullbridge and I think I’m a ward Councillor for Dullbridge. Not sure, but I think I might be.”

Everyone quickly agreed that Cllr NotBothered was definitely the best man for the job.

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