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Smells BeFuddled Party has confirmed that they have selected Teresa Stunt as their candidate for the Smells Constituency Parliamentary candidate in the next General Election, which must be held before June 2025.
Ms Stunt was previously the MP for Smells, which includes Smalltown and Dullbridge, for five years from 2010, which was the first time in history that a non-Illiberal Party candidate had represented the area.
Still harbouring under the misapprehension that Ms Stunt won the seat in 2010 on merit, rather than it being a reaction by voters who refused to vote for the Illiberal Party candidate, David Duckhouse-Emery, following his expenses misappropriation scandal, the BeFuddled Party remain convinced that Ms Stunt can win the seat back from current incumbant Illiberal Tim Teepee.
A Smells BeFuddled Party spokesperson said “Ms Stunt is known for listening to the subjects which are of concern to locals and then going away and never mentioning it again.
Ms Stunt has a long-standing commitment to openness and transparency and can be relied upon to be honest at all times. Admittedly there was that slight kerfuffle back in 2010 after allegations were received that she’d had a couple of gentlemen friends living in her house, whilst still claiming single-person discount on her Council tax, but she explained that one away and no charges were brought. So that turned out to be nothing more than a big pile of manure.”
However, should the Boundary Commission recommendations, which are due to be put before Parliament in June, be accepted then Smalltown and Dullbridge will become part of the new Fridgpond Constituency and SaD residents won’t be able to vote for either Ms Stunt or Mr Teepee.
Unfortunately if Smalltown and Dullbridge remain in the Smells Constituency, then local residents can expect to see a lot more of Ms Stunt over the coming years, as she will be popping up for every possible photo opportunity in the towns.