Mysterious lights spotted

Several readers have contacted SomersetClive to report incidences of strange lights in the sky above Smalltown and Dullbridge.

“I was walking along the beach at approximately 10.30pm – you can only visit Smalltown beach in the dark, because Sadgebore District Council’s new rules mean that anyone spotted on the beach in daylight hours will be arrested.” reader Fox Mouldy told us, “I happened to look upwards and spotted some strange lights in the sky. It was definitely not a plane, because it seemed to hover for a while, before shooting upwards at a vast rate of knots.”

Reader Diana Scullerymaid confirmed the sighting, saying “I saw it too! At first I wondered if the council had finally got around to replacing the missing light bulbs on the South Promenade but then realised that the lights were hanging over the sea. I also spotted a man acting suspiciously. He seemed to be able to control the object using a little box, so he obviously possessed some sort of other-worldly superpowers.”

We consulted local expert on everything and nothing, Dani Morris, who told us “In the last five minutes I have conducted extensive research into the matter on the internet and I can confirm that the strange lights are produced by someone shining a torch into the sky. Everyone needs to calm down.”

We asked a member of staff working at the Smalltown Tracking Unidentified Flying Fings (STUFF) facility in Area 94 for their opinion, they told us “No. It definitely wouldn’t be aliens. Aliens are only ever attracted by higher intelligence, so they wouldn’t be interested in Smalltown or Dullbridge.

It is far more likely to have been a drone, probably enticed into the area by the droning noises it could hear from Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council’s premises at Hayloft Road Palace.”

Did you see the lights? Let SomersetClive know.

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