Our new columnist Councillor Fencesitter is back to explain how Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council works.
Part Two – Council Committees.
An important part of being a Councillor (apart from being able to tell people you are a Councillor and thus claim some sort of imagined credibility) is having the ability to make Very Important Decisions.
Decisions are made in Council Meetings and you are expected to attend several of these a year. To this end, Councillors are selected to sit on committees.
If you are very lucky, and Squire Teflon likes you, then you may get to sit on an exciting committee such as Town Unimprovements or the White Elephant Enclosure Management committee. If the Squire doesn’t like you you will be relegated to the Burial committee, where Squire Teflon hopes you will be.
You do not need to have any prior knowledge of anything which may be pertinent to the committee you sit on. In fact it’s better that you don’t. If you have never run a business and have absolutely no understanding of the phrases ‘Double-entry Bookkeeping’, ‘Profit and Loss’ or ‘Spreadsheets’ then you will fit in perfectly on both the Finance and Misappropriation and the WEE Management committees.
Before attending a meeting you will be supplied with a copy of the agenda. This gives you information on the topics which you will be discussing. There is no need for you to comment on any of the proposals during the meeting. Squire Teflon doesn’t like that – unless he has expressly given you permission to back up his own thoughts and ideas.
If you are a member of the Illiberal Party you will be required to attend a meeting held before the meeting, where Squire Teflon will tell you how to vote (either for or against) any of the proposals put before you. It is important that you do not deviate from this, otherwise you will find yourself relegated to the Burial Committee.
As a member of the opposition BeFuddled Party I find that I often vote the same way as everyone else, even if I don’t agree or understand what is going on. I follow the rest of the herd, because life is easier that way.