The Mistress has needs

After Squire Teflon’s dastardly plan to divert trade from G W Hurling (SomersetClive, 11 January) backfired spectacularly leading to temporary closure of Mistress Bones’ Tat & Newspaper Emporium due to cross contamination, the clean up operation has been completed.

Back in harness, Mistress Bones has sought to impose her will on the forthcoming election campaign by issuing an edict to the local Illiberal Party:

Send me your cannon fodder!
For I am hungry and require sustenance.
Eighteen persons are demanded for self flagellation
To honour and obey Squire Teflon’s every wish
And to without question follow us into the sunlit uplands
For the greater glory of the Illiberal party.
Amen!

Mystified as to the meaning of this outburst and worried about the well-being of the Mistress following her ill health, SomersetClive speculates the Illiberals are short of election candidates for Smalltown & Dullbridge Town Council.

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