Council agrees Cybermen insurance

At a recent meeting of the Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council Frittering and Reckless Spending committee, councillors studied a 94 page document to consider the benefits of Cybermen Insurance.

Most of the content went over their heads, however, they agreed that the cost of £940.00 was very good value indeed for something they didn’t understand. The document showed that, whilst an attack by Cybermen was unlikely, there was a very slim possibility that it could happen and the Town Council should put measures in place to safeguard against such an attack.

Dullbridge resident rent-a-commenter, Ted Stark was briefly confused by the discussion of Cybermen, mishearing them as The Cydermen – a long-standing rival to Dullbridge’s skittles team, The Dullards. His interjection was roundly ignored by the meeting.

Councillor Bodge proposed that the Council should apply for £94,000 worth of cover and everyone agreed that this sounded like a jolly good idea, if only they knew what they were agreeing to, and the motion was carried. Prior to the meeting the SaDTC Town Clerk issued a reminder to all Councillors attending the meeting to “remember to bring your tablet“, leading to some councillors questioning beforehand whether the meeting was going to be rather stressful if they were going to need to take their blood pressure medications with them.

Deputy Assistant (standby) Mayor Cllr Dick Trolley arrived dressed in day-glo spandex dance gear, assuming that the tablet reference implied it would be another of the Squire’s legendary Benelyn-fuelled raves.

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