Squire Teflon has revealed his plans to expand his territory and take control of Somerset.
“Following the news that the current Chair of Somerset Cuonty Council has had to step down from the role I am confident that the position is mine for the taking. As you are all aware, I was elected Vice-Chair earlier this year, so it’s only natural that I should assume the position of Chair. I can’t wait to get my hands on that even bigger and shiner necklace.”
“I know some people think that, as Leader, Rabid Featherlung is the real man in power, but he doesn’t get to wear those shiny chains nor are people expected to doff their caps to him upon meeting him in the corridors of power. I will be reinstating this requirement and will also require everyone to bow and scrape when they see me. This will see me gain the respect I feel I deserve.”
SomersetClive spoke to Cllr. Featherlung about the Squire’s plans and he told us “Chair? It’s a nothing-position really, a mere title – although it does come with a very big shiny necklace – but really only someone with delusions of grandeur or an over inflated sense of their own self-importance would make a fuss about it. It’s not like being leader, or deputy leader, or even the tea lady – those positions are where the power really lies.“