The recent meeting of Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council saw Councillors admit that they had forgotten to include any money in the budget for the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee Celebrations.
“It’s rather unfortunate“, said Councillor Bodge, “but none of us realised this was happening this year, so we didn’t bother to allocate any money for it. It’s not as if we were given notice that this would be a major event and public holiday.”
Squire Teflon explained to the assembled councillors that his close-friend Mistress Bones was “planning a party for local children and funding must be found to bring smiles to the children’s faces. Smiles which haven’t been seen since the Great Ice Rink Debacle of 2015.”
The Town Clerk, Tanya Summer, was immediately sent to comb through all the other Town Council budgets to identify any unallocated money and managed to come up with £9,400 of funding to cover any community events.
As this wasn’t very much money, and would easily be swallowed up by Mistress Jones, councillors agreed that if members of the community wished to put on events they could fund them themselves without assistance from the council.
“Hopefully no one will notice that we forgot we would need to put money aside for this – the lack of bunting festooning the town may cause raised eyebrows, but I’m sure we can explain this away by citing ‘environmental’ concerns” Cllr. Pennyfarthing commented.
Councillors congratulated themselves on the excellent cover-up job and celebrated with a pizza delivery.