Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Council’s new Poo Patrols got off to a flying start, with a group of town rangers and volunteers counting poo.
Those involved spent the week marking any poo found with chalk paint to highlight the amount of sh*t on the streets of Smalltown and Dullbridge.
Hayloft Road topped the list of places to avoid if residents don’t want to step in anything dodgy and several Councillors were observed to be sprayed head to toe in luminous green paint.
A SaD Town Council spokesperson said “The results of the surveys have shown that there are repeat offenders. Many of our Councillors were observed talking sh*t in Council meetings and feedback received shows that this is at its peak during White Elephant Enclosure Mismanagement Committee meetings.
There was a feeling that this could be because Councillors act irresponsibly and agree to ridiculous ideas when they think they aren’t being watched.
The suppliers of the chalk paint have assured us that the paint will wash off in time, but in the meantime residents should steer well clear of anyone emitting a green glow as to engage with them could see residents react with incredulity at the nonsense that comes from our Councillors’ mouths.”
The next stage of the campaign will see posters affixed to the doors of the Hayloft Road Palace Retirement Home for Bemused and Bewildered BeFuddled Party ex-Teachers (and Others), and the White Elephant Enclosure highlighting the dangers of hearing sh1t within.