The White Elephant Enclosure
I personally haven’t never ever heard anyone talk about the White Elephant Enclosure so although I myself haven’t seen or heard any evidence to suggest that people in Smalltown and Dullbridge don’t like paying such a high proportion of their Council Tax to pay for it I still have an opinion on it. Opinions are good. So long as that is all they are.
Former-Headmaster Fencesitter and Deputy Headmistress Cruella Sherry have both told me that the White Elephant Enclosure is brilliant and must be kept in the hands of Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Council no matter what. They have both told me that I must tell everyone that the WEE is awesome.
It’s true that acting is a dying art and people can’t afford to pay out for something they don’t use but Former-Headmaster Fencesitter likes using it and who do these people think they are trying to take away what little enjoyment he has? My school drama department has really been struggling recently, and we all really need to support it. Otherwise in the future there will be no actors acting or dancers dancing.
I’m not stupid and if people are struggling to pay their Council Tax due to the Cost of Living Crisis which means they can’t afford food let alone to subsidise the idea that the WEE can be a success if they pay more money for it they can ask the All-New-Yet-Unimproved Somerset Cuonty Council for help.
ANYUSCC has a massive bag of gold coins which they’ve taken from Council Tax payers and which they can give to Council Tax payers to help with the cost of their Council Tax payments. So these payments to residents that need them don’t actually cost Council Tax payers anything. Isn’t that awesome?
It’s true we did increase the subsidy for the WEE in our first BeFuddled budget and SaD Town Council did approve handing over the sum of £175,000 but we had to do that because the WEE doesn’t have enough money coming in to cover all the costs of the money going out like a good businesses should. So it’s obvious that we had to give it money.
Head of Mathematics Mr Barracuda tried to explain it to me, myself and I but I’m not very good at maths so I didn’t really understand what he was saying but he said that in order to cover the cost which is very high we really needed to raise Council Tax by 20% but instead we decided to only increase it by 7% and to take the remaining money from the SaD TC savings account. Money that has built up over the years from previous Council Tax payment so it isn’t actually costing Council Tax payers anything. Isn’t that awesome?
Some Councillors, like Squire Teflon were worried that taking money from the Council’s savings would leave us in a dangerous precarious position. But Mr Barracuda said the obvious way around depleting our savings to save the WEE would be to not over spend in other areas, such as Christmas Lights and Trees. Isn’t that awesome?
And do bare in mind that Town Councillors pay council tax too. I was shocked to discover that. Luckily most of the grown up BeFuddled Councillors get a teachers pension and I don’t have to pay Smalltown and Dullbridge Council Tax because I don’t live in Smalltown or Dullbridge and people who are still at school don’t have to pay it anyway.
So there you go. The WEE doesn’t cost Council Tax payers as much money as people think.
It’s that awesome?
(Ed – Emma, I know you weren’t very pleased when you drew the short straw, but did you proof read Robb’s first contribution?
No, Mr Clive Saint, Sir. It’s all his own work. He asked if he could copy my homework, but I told him I didn’t get homework.)