SaDTC desperately seek SPAM and SCAMPI

As well as the current search for a new Smalltown Permanent Arts Manager (SPAM) for the White Elephant Enclosure, Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Council has confirmed it is now also looking for a replacement for the Smalltown Culture and Media Person (SCAMP), after Billie Elliot quit his role last month.

The new vacancy for a Smalltown Culture and Media Person (Interim), (SCAMPI), will be a very, very, very short term contract as it will expire in March 2024 as per the terms of the previous SCAMP contract. This period could prove to be even shorter if the successful applicant is already in gainful employment and needs to serve out any notice.

The SCAMP was originally employed following a recommendation from the previous Smalltown Culture and Arts Manager (SCAM), who felt that the additional staff member was needed to do the parts of her job she couldn’t be bothered with.

Despite the vacancy for the new SPAM seeking to appoint someone who is an ‘enthusiastic and motivated person to promote and manage the White Elephant Enclosure in Smalltown‘, with the perfect candidate having ‘a proven track record in venue management, including programming and marketing, the new SCAMPI will also need a ‘track record in programming and marketing for a similar venue’.

It looks as if the White Elephant Enclosure will soon have two new Elephant Wranglers, both employed to do the same thing, as SaDTC pin their hopes on new staff being able to achieve the impossible.

With a salary for the new SCAMPI vacancy offered at a pro-rata rate of £25,000 to £27,000, coupled with the SPAM salary of £30,000 to £35,000, this means a total outlay of between £45,000 to £50,000, before the addition of Employer’s National Insurance and pension contributions.

Given that previous income at the WEE – before the latest the *New *Vastly Improved *Unexplainable *Seasonally Adjusted *Just Not Possible income figures were produced – and as estimated in the approved budget for 2023-24, income has consistently been around the £40-50,000 mark, so it would seem that SaD Town Council are already spending more than they can hope to achieve in return.

The White Elephant Enclosure struggled along for years with only one Elephant Wrangler and the introduction of a second didn’t improve matters, so quite why the WEE Mismanagement Committee feel that two people will be the answer to their prayers is baffling.

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