BeFuddleds in Disarray

Local BeFuddled Party Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Councillors have admitted that they are in disarray, with one Councillor, who wished to remain anonymous, telling SomersetClive “It’s chaos. Half of us don’t know what we are supposed to be doing and the other half also don’t know what they are supposed to be doing but are going to carry on doing it regardless.”

We have split into two factions. Those who really haven’t got a clue and don’t mind admitting it and the Mayor, Deputy Mayor and their cohorts who haven’t got a clue but are pretending that they do.

It’s getting really embarrassing. When I was first elected as a Councillor I thought it would be a really simple job, and I made sure everyone I knew, and even people I didn’t know, used my Councillor title all the time. I thought people would be really delighted to be able to tell people that they knew a Councillor.

Now, with all the kerfuffle that’s gone on and all the responsibility that the job entails, I’ve had nothing but criticism about the way we are handling things. It’s so bad that I’ve had to stop going out.

Councillor Fencesitter is no help either. He told us that being a Councillor is easy and that no one would mind that we didn’t have a clue. Now he keeps telling us that we are doing a good job, even though we are doing it wrong. He didn’t explain that we would actually have to make decisions. We are BeFuddleds. We don’t make decisions. And when we do they are generally the wrong ones.”

We spoke to a local party member who told us “I no longer admit to being a BeFuddled Party Member. It was such fun when all we had to do was pay our subscription and turn up to Cllr Fencesitter’s annual Strawberry Cake and Tea Party. Now all my friends are laughing at me for being a BeFuddled supporter.

I’m considering cancelling my subscription and joining the Illiberal Party, but I’m not sure if their cake is any good.”

Our source told us “Some of our local BeFuddled Party group members have called for a Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) branch meeting to discuss the fallout from recent SaD Town Council meetings, but so far we haven’t been able to agree a date to hold it on.”