Sadgebore do their homework

BeFuddled Party local chairman and Town Councillor Banish Barracuda reported the latest developments made by the Task Force for Economic and Tourism Advantage (TaFFETA) to councillors attending the Town Council meeting at Hayloft Road Palace Retirement Home for Bemused and Bewildered BeFuddled Party Ex-Teachers (and Others).

TaFFETA is a new project for the town, set up at the behest of Sadgebore District Council, following a presentation at the previous Town Council meeting by Mo Porrison, to help prove that Sadgebore know where Smalltown is. The Task Force will be funded by £49,994 of cash which will be spent on experts, consultations and a new ‘brand’ for Smalltown. Ms. Porrison also confirmed that there won’t actually be any money available to implement any of the ideas the TaFFETA come up with

Whispering into his microphone Cllr Barracuda confirmed that “I attended a workshop with representatives from the Smalltown Chamber of Trade (SCOT), Smalltown Shops (SS), the Smalltown Leader of Usefulness and Tourism (SLUT), officers from Sadgebore District Council and business magnate Lex Turkey.

After several hours of discussion we were able to conclude that Smalltown is a Seaside Town and the officers from Sadgebore have now gone away to work on providing us with a written report confirming this.

We will now look at forming a steering committee, which I hope will include residents as well as the aforementioned groups and individuals, to work on coming up with ideas to market our town, as it would appear that no one who lives outside of the area knows that Smalltown exists. This will be known as the Funding Taskforce to Inject Life into the Economy (FuTILE) and I will report back to this council once we’ve had a really good think about ideas.’

Headmistress and Town Mayor Kelsey Dullard thanked Cllr Barracuda for his lovely report and said she looked forward to hearing more about his project in future.

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