Carnivoo highlights in colour

As Smalltown bids farewell to Carnivoo for another year SomersetClive is delighted to bring you photographic highlights of the Greatest Free Show on Earth.

(Ed – Right you ‘orrible lot. Where are the photos?

Oh, Mr Clive Saint, Sir. We couldn’t find the office camera yesterday. We assumed you’d taken it.

Ed – You ‘couldn’t find the office camera’? What sort of pathetic childish lazy behinds excuse is that? Didn’t any of you take photos on your phones?

No Sir. Sorry Sir.

Ed – And this is why Media Mogul Mike Maxman has an award-winning website and we don’t. Even the Smalltown Weekly Snooze will have Carnivoo photos in their December 10th issue. Sometimes I despair.)

Sorry Sir. You see most of us stayed at home and those of us who didn’t watched from inside the pub.

Ed – What am I going to tell Dictator Dullard now? She will want to know why there are no photographs of her watching the parade. Before you know it I will be summoned to Hayloft for a dressing down from her and Deputy Dictator Cruella. I’ll probably be told to never talk to the media again. And then where will we be?)

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