Top Secret contract up for grabs

Deputy Dictator Sherry’s Top Secret Human Resources Sub-Committee recently drew up a Top Secret Report, which recommends the appointment of a Top Secret contractor to strim the Top Secret grass at the Top Secret Cemeteries at Brunt Road, EastMeadow Road Smalltown and Smalltown Road Dullbridge.

Dictator Sherry presented the Top Secret Report to Councillors at Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council Finance and Misappropriation meeting seeking a rubber stamp for her action.

The Top Secret Report claims that the appointment of a new contractor to cut and strim the grass around the gravestones at the cemeteries for 2 days per week over a 3-month period will cost an additional £6,875.34, and will mean that the staff currently employed to do this exact same work will be able to put their feet up and have a nice cup of tea instead.

Fearful of repurcussions from Deputy Dictator Sherry if they dared to question the report or vote against agreeing, SaD Town Councillors unanimously agreed that the sum of £133 for each day’s worth strimming over the three month period was exceptionally good value for money.

Cllr Sherry pointed out that this move would free up time for the Brunt Road Caretaker, the two Town Rangers and the two Groundspeople currently employed by Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council to do the job, so that they could instead focus on… Ummmm. What is they do every day? No. SomersetClive has no idea either.

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