It’s the one SomersetClive readers have been waiting for. What does Dictator Dullard make of the man who previously pulled all the strings on Smalltown and Dullb (SaD) Town Council?
Squire Teflon
Illiberal Party
Well, what can I say? It’s been an absolute delight to spend time with Squire Teflon. He has been the epitome of charm and despite having lost control of his Council to the BeFuddled Party he hasn’t interfered at all in the way we’ve gone about conducting ourselves.
He often laughs out loud during Council meetings, which just goes to show how happy he is to sit back and watch us all muddle through as we try to grasp the concept of procedures and protocols.
We often look to Squire Teflon to ascertain what he thinks of a proposal put to the Council, he is always ready to give his opinion and we are then able to nod our heads in agreement with whatever he says.
Squire Teflon is a member of practically every Committee and Working Group going, apart from the Dead and Buried Committee.
He has even attended, spoken out and voted on matters which are put before the Town Unimprovements Committee, despite not actually being a member of that committee. This shows a dedication above and beyond his duty and enabled him to speak out about the competition his close-friend and employer Mistress Bones would have faced at her Newspaper and Tat Emporium if the Intergalactic Food, Craft and Tat Marketfair had gone ahead. His comments led to the proposal bring declined.
His input into the White Elephant Enclosure has been invaluable, although following the departure of his most magnificent employee the Smalltown Culture and Arts Manager (SCAM), he has refused to attend further meetings and has instead decided to let Deputy Dictator Cllr Sherry dig herself out of her own hole.
Once a confirmed fixture of Mike Maxman’s news site Squire Teflon has been very quiet this term and has actually requested that Mr Maxman removes all references to both himself and his close-friend and employer Mistress Bones from the website.
He appears to have been rather subdued lately which is obviously his response to my successful partnership with Deputy Dictators Sherry and Knickers.
At the start of the new school year his attendance was perfect, but in recent months this has started to tail off and he only has a 67% record, having attended 23 out of a possible 34 committee meetings.
However, his attendance at TUMPS meetings , the committee he isn’t actually on, is 100%. He has never been listed as a substitute for these meetings, so it is a mystery why the Smalltown Administration Guru (SAG) has allowed him to participate.
Behnd the scenes Squire Teflon has made a lot of comments about how ‘useless the BeFuddleds are’. I believe this is his idea of a joke, because he has never said anything to me or any of my colleagues about it.
Effort: 1/10
Achievement: 1/10
Conclusion: Although I have found Squire Teflon a delight to have on my side I am struggling with his lack of desire to contribute to such important matters as the ‘We Are All Going To Die’ and my Climate Rescue Action Plan (CRAP). I do think that he has the potential to help out a bit more, but he displays an unwillingness to cooperate