Dictator Dullard Declares ‘Disappointment’

Smalltown and Dullbridge (SaD) Town Headmistress, Mayor and Dictator Cllr Kelsey Dullard has voiced her disappointment after it emerged that not a single resident had joined in with Deputy Dictator Cllr Sherry’s needlework classes.

Dictator Dullard said “I was utterly dismayed to find that Smalltown and Dullbridge residents did not comply with our dictat to produce yards of bunting as we had instructed.

It was a perfectly reasonable request – all residents had to do was follow the exact pattern, without deviation, that the Smalltown Administration Guru (SAG), Katie Global, had spent hours producing and posting on the SaD Town Council website.

I was looking forward to unrolling all the lovely bunting and giving a long speech thanking you all for your lovely work.

Instead I am devastated that you all chose to defy me. We didn’t receive so much as a single bunt.

This was supposed to be a lovely fun project that anyone with a sewing machine and several rolls of fabric could get involved with and not one of you bothered. There are no excuses for this behaviour.

I am extremely disappointed in all of you and you can all expect to be joining Cllr McCads in detention.”

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