Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Councillors who were present at the Annual Towns Meeting last week have expressed their relief that no one mentioned either the White Elephant Enclosure or the ‘Dangerous Tree’ on the corner of Vicarage and Barrow Road.
It later emerged that several residents who had planned to raise the issue during the meeting had been unaware of the change of venue. The Annual Towns Meeting has previously always been held at the Hayloft Road Palace Retirement Home for Bemused and Bewildered BeFuddled Party ex-Teachers (and Others), but in a break from tradition was moved to the Porland Hall in Dullbridge.
Resident Rowan Fraserfirtree said “In the interests of being environmentally-friendly I walked to Hayloft Road in order to register my disgust at Dictator Dullard’s duplicity in deciding the future olf the Dangerous Tree without consulting any one. Image my surprise when I got to Hayloft Palace to discover the place in darkness.
By the time I arrived and discovered that the meeting was being held in Dullbridge I didn’t have time to walk the extra distance.”
Several residents who wished to bring up the amount of money wasted on the WEE were similarly disappointed, with one even suggesting that the lack of publicity about both the meeting and change of venue had been sadly lacking.
Anthony Floyd-Blubber said “It was bad enough that I only discovered that the Annual Towns Meeting was taking place this morning without then finding out that it wasn’t being held at Hayloft Road. I don’t even know where Porland Hall is and had no chance of finding the place in the time available.
I really wanted to quiz Deputy Headmistress and Mayor, Cllr Eugenie Sherry, on her plans for the White Elephant Enclosure and ask her how long this already long-running farce will continue. Every resident that I’ve spoken to considers it a complete waste of money and that, after ten years of failure, it should now be given to Mr Irishh, of the Blitz Cinema, to see if he can make a success of it.”
The Smalltown Administration Guru (SAG), Katie Global said” “When Dictator Dullard first told me that we would be hosting the Annual Towns Meeting I asked her if she wanted me to spread the word amongst residents of Smalltown and Dullbridge by placing advertisements in the local media and putting posters on the town notice boards.
Dictator Dullard told me not to bother, because she really didn’t want anyone to turn up and ask difficult questions. We both agreed that we would keep it as quiet as possible and, rather than pay for any advertising, we would place a small notice on our big noticeboard, where no one would be able to see it.
As you know, both Dictator Dullard and Deputy Dictator Sherry much prefer to conduct their meetings in secret behind closed doors and this was no exception. As far as SaD Town Council is concerned this meeting was a huge success in terms of suppressing criticism.”
Yet another example of the BeFuddled Party’s understanding of the words ‘Open, Transparent and Honest’.