In scenes remiscent of an episode of classic television comedy series ‘Father Ted’ protestors gathered outside Smalltown Library in an attempt to intimidate parents and children attending Story Time.
Waving banners and clutching placards which read ‘Stop Educationing Are Kids’ and ‘Storeys our Dangerus’ the protestors were joined outside the library by a rival faction who believe that reading stories to children is a good idea and can do no harm. Both sets of protestors had been brought in by bus to share their views with residents of Smalltown.
A spokesidiot for the ‘Storeys is Bad’ group told SomersetClive “We are here because we don’t think the kiddies should be encouraged to read books. Books is dangerous in the wrong hands and reading stories to kiddies could see them being teached all the wrong stuff.
We are here to protect the kiddies and warn their parents of the dangers of allowing strangers to read stories to them. Libraries aren’t the place to be encouraging reading.”
A counter-protestor said “That group are a bunch of idiots, aren’t they?”
A few scuffles broke out between the group, but Smalltown Police forced their way between the groups telling them firmly to “Put your handbags away.”
Attempts by members of the ‘Storeys is Bad’ group to whip Smalltown residents up into a frenzy and join their protest fell on deaf ears, as people in Smalltown and Dullbridge proved themselves to have a high enough level of intelligence to understand that it was all a load of nonsense.
Speaking after the event, Smalltown librarian Edie Reader said “Everyone inside the library had a great time! The children thoroughly enjoyed themselves, there was lots of laughter and not a single child asked their parent “Why is that man wearing a sparkly suit and wig?”. They were happy to accept it for what it was. A character reading stories.”
Over at the forum, regulars Nurk, Operationpigmuck & Merkin say “down with this sort of thing” & “careful now” whilst frantically editing their search histories.