It has been announced this week that the long running legal case by local media tycoon, Mike Maxwell, against All-New-But-Unimproved-Somerset-Cuonty-Council election candidate for Dullbridge Dump, Alan Incendiary, has been settled out of Court.
Whilst the settlement is confidential, SomersetClive understands Maxwell has accepted a substantial donation to his favourite charity, Smalltown Area Ship, Hovercraft and Helicopter (SMASHH). A new rescue craft, Maxwell’s Hustle, is to be commissioned.
The saga began last Summer at a Smalltown & Dullbridge (SaD) Town Council Destruction committee meeting when Alan Incendiary spoke as a member of the public. The electorate had more sense than to elect him to SaD Town Council last time around.
Incendiary feigned indignation concerning a story Maxwell had written about potential Smalltown Town Centre improvements proposed by the-now-soon-to-splinter Cllr Fencesitter. Alan Incendiary made a speech at Hayloft Road Palace alleging that the Befuddled party had leaked its proposals to Maxwell in advance of the meeting and so Incendiary demanded a retraction and apology.
Cllr Fencesitter took great delight in pointing out to Incendiary that the proposal upon which Maxwell had reported was published on the SaD Town Council website before Maxwell’s story. This meant no evidence existed of a leak.
Left red faced by this clinical smack down from Cllr Fencesitter, no apology was offered to Maxwell for this public blunder. Given Squire Teflon’s keen patronage of Smalltown Town Centre and the interests of his close friend, Mistress Bones, and Smalltown Shops (SS) Tyrant, Lady Brassy of Easton under Water, SomersetClive wonders how Alan Incendiary could have been so unaware of SaD Town Council procedure concerning document publication.
Notwithstanding the difficulty of finding documents on SaD Town Council’s LieCrap system, the only logical conclusion is Alan Incendiary was set up by the Squire in an act of illiberal cult devotion. He was duly rewarded with the chance to represent Dullbridge at the forthcoming election.