The rescue of a small rat from a person hole in Dullbridge, by Councillors Woodenman and Incendiary, kept people around the world on the edge of their seats as they watched the story unfold and has both incensed and inspired Squire Teflon
“Why should those two get that sort of press coverage” The Squire exclaimed. “Woodenman should have had that broken person hole replaced years ago. It’s just not fair that he’s getting credit. His name is on everyone’s lips.”
Squire Teflon has contacted the Smalltown History Society to ask if they have any old maps of the area which show where other person holes may be located. It is rumoured that his requirements are for a deep and wide hole.
“It’s a genius idea” Teflon told SomersetClive. “My plan is to carry out a similar rescue from a similar hole but on a larger scale. At first I thought I could push a small child down there, my work as a panel member for Local Adoption Services means that I have plenty of access to small children, but I dismissed this idea as it would be the child that everyone was talking about.“
“Instead myself and my close friend, Mistress Bones, will toss for it. Whichever of us comes first will agree to being pushed into the hole by the other.”
“What can possibly go wrong?” Teflon enquired. “It’s not as if anyone in Smalltown and Dullbridge will like the idea of leaving either of us stuck in the bottom of a hole for weeks.”
Should the Squire be trusted with children given his unstable position in relationships and his plastic rink attempt to entice children into his grotto?