Friends with Benefits

The Squire finds a candidate

Following the shock rexpulsionation of Cllr Ellen Proves, Dullbridge Liberation Front representative for Dullbridge, from Smalltown and Dullbridge Town Council, Councillors agreed not to follow the democratic process for a replacement but will instead give the job to one of their friends.

Squire Teflon told the meeting “I don’t really see the point in spending £1940 to hold an election which could result in the residents of Dullbridge getting a candidate of their choice. It would be a much better idea if I just choose the person I want and then that money can be spent on The White Elephant Enclosure instead. This would represent a far better waste of money.”

Given that the pool of ‘Friends of the Squire’ from which to choose is sadly dwindling, SomersetClive has suspended all betting, as it appears that the Squire’s close friend Mistress Bones may well be in line for the job.

When SomersetClive questioned her on the matter she replied “Who told you that? Whatever makes you think I would want to be on the Town Council? Can you tell whoever has been saying that to please stop, it’s not nice.”

It remains to be seen if the Squire has any other friends who could be press ganged into the position.

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