The Smalltown Media & Uproar Genius (SMUG) committee of SaD Town Council is delighted to announce that it has directed the Smalltown Culture & Arts Manager (SCAM) to apply for £394,000 of quango funding made available by the Department of Distracting Signage.
The deadline for the application is tight and so all other priorities and plans from the SCAM have gone out of the window. Instead, like bees around a pot of honey, this latest scheme takes precedence because of the photo opportunities it might generate, which will in turn distract local residents from the ongoing annual loss of £94,000 underwritten by the taxpayer.
At a recent meeting of the White Elephant Enclosure (WEE) cartel, the Squire thought this would be a tremendous idea so all members present (and some who weren’t) were noted as supporting the proposal. Details of how any funds secured would be used were rather vague.
Perish the thought that cartel members might pursue a line of inquiry about how the cash might reduce the ongoing loss. Or even if the SCAM knew whether it might do so! SaD Town Council & the Squire look forward to doubling down on its decade of failure at the WEE and issuing media coverage, rather than getting value for money out of local services for the residents it is meant to serve.