Your compliant reporter has been reprimanded by the big boss Clive Saint for writing too much about the machinations of the illiberals. In the interests of fairness, the spotlight must fall next on the local Befuddled party. Apparently, there must be something interesting about their candidates.
In Dullbridge Captain Andy Rum was not put off from being a victim of Saul Synn’s sham co-option. Instead, with Synn bailing on Dullbridge, Capt Rum has had the last laugh through being elected unopposed.
Meanwhile, fellow elected unopposed BeFuddled Lord Charlie Spencer is a well known athlete. This is a helpful quality. Doing a runner from Hayloft Road Palace is a well trodden path for many BeFuddleds before their term of office expires, in recent years.
As for Barbara Windsor, there is nothing to write. Except that telling Squire Teflon to ‘get out of her pub’ would probably close it due to lack of profit.
Moving to Smalltown, King of Pie Charts Banish Barracuda is an heir apparent to Cllr Fencesitter’s throne. Al KeepTrying stood last time around but that’s about all that is known but it’s a longer CV than Nicola Berry and Rob CandlestickMaker. Meanwhile, Les Dullard appears to have connections in Barrow and Bream.
With the Befuddleds fielding such an inexperienced team it seems the Befuddleds want to be neither seen nor heard. It will be up to Jock McCads, Squire Teflon’s enemy in Smalltown Posh, to take the lead.
However, McCads has lost more elections than the combined attendance at Hayloft Road Palace of all the other Befuddleds put together!